Excited on my 28th

My birthday is near, and I'm excited about it. I am hopeful that when I become 28, I would finally move on from being 25.  

Yeah, I've been stuck on my 25th birthday.  I don't really understand why but I just don't feel like I'm already getting close to being in my 30's.

I wish I could step up to another stage of my life, where my plans are already definite, my dreams are closer to reality, and my actions are upfront and always with conviction.

I hope I could do bigger things not just for myself, but for Him in heaven and for my loved ones here on Earth.

I hope I could finally bring out my best, and not just think about money, money, and money. I just want to be truly happy.

Happy Birthday to me! 

Usapang Pag-ibig

Sa dinami-dami ng mga narinig kong kwento galing sa mga kaibigan kong "in a relationship", nasaktan, nakasakit,  naghahanap, at nangangarap ng "true love", masasabi kong may kanya-kanya talaga tayo ng pagtingin sa pakikipagrelasyon---May mga taong hinahanap muna ung spark at sabog puso moment bago nila masabing gusto nga talaga nilang makasama ang tao na 'yon.  Eto madalas yung kahit gaano kaganda o kaguwapo ang iharap mo sa kanya, kung walang "magic", hindi pa rin siya go.  May iba namang kahit wala pa sa sabog puso stage, pero like naman nila ang isa't isa, pwede na kumbaga, commit na, just to try. If magwork, OK. If hindi, sorry na lang.  At yung iba naman, may listahan ng requirements, qualifications, conditions, whatever you call it.  Parang sa bidding lang. Kung sino man ang maka-meet ng mga iyon, yun ang karapat-dapat para sa kanya. 

Pero kahit ano pa man ang pag-approach mo, ang mahalaga, desisyon mo iyon at hindi ng ibang taong akala mo sila ang taga-drawing ng buhay mo.  Paninindigan mo ang desisyon na 'yon maging maganda o pangit man ang ending.  Sa bawat relasyon namang pinapasok natin, natututo tayo at nakikita what it takes to experience true happiness with that someone special.

Masaya akong nahanap ko na ang true love ko. At alam ko, the best is yet to come for my friends who are still looking for "the one".  Lagi ko lang sinasabi sa kanila, go lang ng go. Masaya magmahal. Madalas ka ring masasaktan.  Di ko sila pipigilang balik-balikan yung taong kinakitaan nila ng spark. Di ko rin naman sila sasabihang huwag masyadong try ng try o di kaya maging  pihikan.  But they should understand that it's not only them who needs to be loved, they should learn to give a part of themselves to that other person too.

Ayun lang naman. Just for a thought. :)

When I Say "I miss PAL"

I was supposed to post this article after seeing the photos from the last ISD Christmas party. But I thought it wouldn't be a good time to tell sad things in the middle of a 'happy season'. This time I think I can already post this. It's been a year since I left PAL.


I've been struggling with my new work environment since my day 1. Besides that I am working with foreigners, the place where I am right now is TOTALLY different in terms of...everything? The only thing in common are the mainframe box and the green screen.


I was advised not to take things too negatively because I might just freak out one day, book a ticket, and go back home. So instead of ranting about the unhappy things here, may I just try to reminisce the best things that I liked during my stay at PAL.

The Morning Rush

Me & Busmate Pam

Before I got confirmed, I was always in a battle of getting up early and taking the fastest but cheapest way to office. I used to either take the shuttle vans to Makati, or take the bus to Baclaran or jeepney to Airport Road and then walk or ride a pedicab to Domestic Road. It was such a hassle but, I really felt like I burned so much calories every morning.

Time came when buddy Pam started offering a car pool. Meeting place is at Mercury Drug in Casimiro, but on craving days, at Jollibee. I still enjoyed the morning rush, because we got to experience so many things along the trip to office--some are bad, some are funny. :D

Most of the time I was still rushing to beat our meeting time--that's preparing myself for office in 10-15mins.

Work=Play

I'm not saying that I didn't take my work seriously when I was with PAL. :p It's just that everything seemed new to me, or I must say to the four of us in the team, so most of the time, we were eager to try out what we have read from the manuals. It always amazed me when I get to operate or configure a part of the system. I might not have understood it so well at first, but I always wanted to learn more. We didn't find our work boring at all, except for, uhm, the non-stop reading maybe (at least for me!). There was also pressure to familiarize myself with all the technical stuff, and even execute commands or programs on my own, but good vibes is always present. I never felt like I will be thrown off the swamp if I don't meet all their expectations.

A Wacky Afternoon

Of course there were 'petiks' moments, when we would just spend our 15-min break going to one's workstation and chat about the latest showbiz news, one's lovelife, saving money for the future, photography, etc. Anything under the sun. I could say we still felt we were humans even if we were busy with work.

The Lunch Break, With Lights Off

It's the signal that we can go for lunch. We usually eat together either at our workstations, at the pantry, or at the canteen (I miss the DCB canteen!). When we're out of budget, we eat at the canteen. When we have spare money, we eat out or order from Mcdo or Shakeys.

Bonding was always there. Endless chatting. Endless laughing. At times, we talked about personal issues. But what I liked most when telling or listening to stories with them is that, I don't feel intoxicated at all. I don't know why, but it seems like even our heaviest problems become lighter when we share it with each other. Maybe because we rarely rant about our problems. We just share our own stories.

After eating lunch, we would go back to our seats and take a nap. Sleepyhead, as I (or we?) will always be.

My Despedida Night with the ISD Shooters

The (Surprise) Birthday, Wedding, Atbp. Treats

Before I joined ISD, I was always the one treating out people on my birthday or any occasion I am celebrating. But in ISD, it's the other way around. People secretly prepare for your party. And they will keep it from you as much as they can, until the moment you enter the room and they greet you with a blast. I only celebrated two birthdays in PAL. Both were simple yet unforgettable. The third party that they gave me was already my despedida. It's just nice to remember those moments when they let me feel I am truly a part of their family.

The Out-of-Office Activities

The Champions of 2010 ISD Volleyball Cup

Lunchouts. Badminton. Volleyball. Basketball. Jogging. Weekend Tours. Swimming. Dancing. Videoke. Yes, we still had lot of social life back in ISD. For an active person like me, these activities matter a lot. When we felt we're stressed, we would go out--with less cost as much as possible. The McDo's in Pasay and Las Pinas are history. =) ResortsWorld. PAL Sports Center. Mall of Asia. Pangasinan. Tagaytay. Subic. Corregidor. Oh no, elaborating more on these places will just make me cry.

The Dancing
I am not a good dancer but I love to dance. We danced hiphop. We danced ballroom. And we almost danced ethnic. Haha. I enjoyed dancing a lot when I was in PAL. There were so much dancing activities because many from ISD love to dance.

The Extraordinary Christmas Party

Christmas 2008

Need I say more? As my subtitle says, it's extraordinary.  ISD Christmas party would always be planned to be 'simple', but on the day itself, you'd see everyone busy either making costumes, dressing up, practicing their presentations, or setting up the stage.  It's a 3-month-long preparation, since funds for the party must be raised. I was once a part of the Christmas Party Committee (all newbies are required!), and I got to experience the combined pressure and fun as we tried to give the best party to the whole ISD.  I miss it. :(

Eucharistic Celebrations at Reach

It's truly a convenience for me that masses are held at DCB building. First Fridays, days of obligations, and other celebrations. I was happy that I could regularly attend masses despite my busy schedule at work. Somehow, it helped me become stronger in faith.

The Prestige

I am proud that I became part of the company that takes the Filipinos to the other side of the world. I think it just naturally comes with the name. Despite the struggle to revive the 'old days', still, the pride of working at PAL, even for just a short time, will forever be with me. And if only I could afford, I will always fly with PAL.

The People. Period.

There are not enough words to explain why I loved the people in PAL. The friends I gained are priceless. And I know even if we don't talk much now, we are still good friends. We may have not shared much about our personal problems, but we know we will always be there for each other. Just enough exposure, just enough privacy for each of us.

From the bosses, co-employees, to the facilitators, guards, and canteen staff--wala akong masasabi.

I cried for a few times, and they were there to help me.

I got sick on a day that I should not be, and they never left me until I'm okay.

Adjusting to this new place has been tough. But I'd say that I am a lot better now than I was one year ago.

Thanks to those who still keep in touch.

Thanks to the one who's always there to comfort me and make me feel my world is still "PAL-like".

One statement can perfectly end this post---I ain't gonna find a place like PAL.

Moved By An Old Draft Post

I have left this blog since I created it way back in 2009.  As far as I can remember, I put up this blog after fighting big time with my then fiance now husband, about me being dreamless and unrealistic.  I was out of track that time because of the issues I had with myself.  I didn't know where and how my life should go. 

He asked me to list down all the activities that I like and wish to do, the places where I like and wish to go, the things that I like and wish to buy.  Then from one list, I should group them into two---the attainable and the non-attainable.  The attainable ones, I must then make a plan on how to achieve them, while the non-attainable, set aside.  I don't know what happened next, but until now, I think I'm still struggling to complete all the steps and finally find my way.

These past few days, I'm getting distracted by some questions running on my mind.  Where am I going to? How long can I stay in this not-so-friendly but typical Singapore work environment?  How long can I stay in this field that I chose about three years ago, not because this is what I wanted to do, but because among all the other fields that I can get along with, it is the most financially rewarding?  What is making me stay here? 

I'm also having this homesickness attacks at work.  I wrote an article about my previous company, and while thinking where to post it, I passed by this blog.

There were only 3 draft posts in this blog, two are empty.  I was surprised to see the third and only post with something in it, because it is actually a list of my to-do's, to-have's, etc. for the next five years.  Swak!

I went through the list again and realized that from 2009 to 2012, it's either I have already done or am already working on the items. Wow, in barely 3 years, I'm able to do and get what I thought was very hard!  That just uplifted my spirit.  It made me feel thankful.  Made me proud.  Made me humble as well.  I didn't know I've come this far.  And so I write this post.

We cannot keep ourselves from getting distracted and losing direction when we feel very tired and stressed out.  It is a part of life.  I think having a list like this, just as what inspirational/self-help writers and speakers always preach on, is indeed helpful to put us back on track.  It's a good vitamin for our well-being to see that our life moves at least a step over time.

By the way, here's the list portion of my draft post:

Here are the things that I plan to do, to have, and to achieve in the next five years.

1. Marry the only man I truly love. - done

2. Have a baby at least a year and a half after marrying the man in number 1. - working

3. Live with the man in number 1. - done

4. Work where the man in number 1 and I live. - done

5. Help my siblings with their studies. - working

6. Be active in church with the man in number 1. - working

7. Start a regular evening prayer with the man in number 1 and the baby in number 2.

8. Learn how to bake.

9. Go into dancing.

10. Enroll myself in a piano school.

11. Start investing on a house and lot. - done

12. Have a schedule for painting sessions. - working

13. Buy any branded item for myself. - done

14. Look for up to three institutions or NGOs to help.